The Ghosts of Our Past, Present and Future

11 Apr

I feel like Scrooge. I witnessed my past and my possible future all at once. Our wonderful neighbors have had one of the worst couple of days and there has been nothing I could do, but offer support…and think. Their 20-something daughter is dating a less than ideal choice of man. Anyone that tries to control their significant other in any way, but especially through violence, is not worth a second thought. There was drama, loss, medical care requested and heartbreak. Ultimately, the daughter choose the less than stand up guy over her family.

My heart just hurt. Not only for their loss. Also because I saw myself in another life, with a guy who tried to control my every move. I saw the excuses made for the now scar in my hair line. I saw the arguments over this guy. I saw the betrayal and pain. I saw myself.

And then I saw my girls and my heart just dropped.

I know I can’t control my kids’ choices, I can only help give them the tools needed to live their lives. Ultimately, it is their lives with their decisions to make. I can only keep the doors open and discussions at the time where there is a life lesson to be seen. And pray.

Pray that I have raised them right. Pray that our relationship is strong enough that they will come to me with everything good and bad. Pray. Pray that even when they are wearing their big girl shoes, they will still know they can always come home with whatever it is. Pray that I will have the wisdom to help that at whatever stage of life they find themselves.


One Response to “The Ghosts of Our Past, Present and Future”

  1. Amber April 12, 2012 at 8:15 am #

    Ooof! Powerful post, Girlie! I have a few too many skeletons clanking around my closet for comfort. Every night, I pray that I hope my girls never repeat any of the mistakes I made to get those skeletonsl! I do wonder if (or heaven forbid when) the time comes, if, perhaps, disclosing some of my past will help them not to make the same mistakes. Maybe it would convince them that if a situation gives them pause, then it probably isn’t the right situation for them. Or just confirm that I went off my rocker many years ago! :0) Great post – though I’m very sorry for the situation that prompted it.


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