Tell Me Again…

5 Apr

that it has nothing to do with the BLUE shift!  UGH!!

Monday, Blue Shift.  10 hours after saying good-bye to my Willow, 3 1/2 hours after the boys wake up with  fevers, after a night of NO sleep…I back out of the parking spot next to the garage.  My FF has been taking my car, saves gas, when he goes to work.  I have been taking his disaster of a Durango.  Used to be my truck, now J drives it and it looks like a tornado touched down.  But, what is best, I take the truck.

So…back to the Blue Shift on Monday.  I back out of the parking slab and the truck dies.  Just dies. Blocking the whole freakin’ alley.  Its a Blue Shift, my FF is leaving early, for some reason.  I run inside to see if I can grab him.  My sick, mourning kids tell me that he has already left.  I frantically call his phone, ready to beg him to come back.  He’s still in front of the house, no begging needed.  Thank goodness.

So…he drives around the back, he gets the bright idea that we have to push it.  With no power steering, I work to get the wheels to turn and they reluctantly turn.  Come back to help push.  Unfortunately, we are going to hit the garage.  Plan B, my superhero FF is going to push while I fight with the steering wheel.  Plan C. Push the truck with my car.  My poor car.  Now needs touch up paint.  But, we got it out of the alley, around to the front and parked on the correct side of the street for parking restrictions.  Next night our amazing neighbor fixes it – distributor cap.  Yesterday, hubby drives it – no issues.  This AM, it reluctantly starts.  I mention it to my FF as he checks with me.  He kind of condescendingly tells me just to give it some gas as I start it. So, we get to school.  I try, unsuccessfully, to work at my desk, time to get the little stooges over to the other campus, running late, get everyone in their car seats.  No go.  Car won’t turn over.  Sigh.

Luckily, the guidance counselor lent me her keys so I could take my kids to school.  Rush back for the Career Fair today.  Now, I just have to figure out how to get home.  We are a party of 5.  Most people I work with have mini-vans for a reason.  Others with cars, simply don’t have room for 5.  Luckily, again, my good friend Linda came to the rescue and brought us home.

J tells me I will fuss no matter what shift it is. I say the Blue Shift is cursed.  I am so grateful to be moving into a house next to another fire family, who is on the GREEN Shift.  Someone who gets it will be a nice change of  pace.


It is done

2 Apr

Willow’s on the other side of the Rainbow Bridge.  We drove out to our vet’s house last night.  She is simply amazing.  Willow’s hot spot, wasn’t a hot spot.  She said it was probably that her hips were hurting so badly, that she was trying to get whatever was hurting, out.  She didn’t fight, no struggle.  And my Willow girl is a fighter, truly a tough cookie.  But at 8pm last night, there was no fight left.  It was time.  Not that it makes it any easier for anyone.  

A last chance for a few quick pictures…

The kids had a hard time.  I had a hard time.  My FF had a hard time. 

Then, 2:30am, boys woke up with fevers.  When I went to move the truck, it died backing it out of the parking spot, luckily my hubby hadn’t left yet.  He was in the car, but still here.  He pushed me out of the alley.  The Bear got out.  It just did not get any better.  Tears were flowing.  No one slept very well.  The boys said they felt fine, even though I was not so sure.  Just one of those days I guess.

We had a pancake breakfast.   Then I decided to make a trip to Build-A-Bear.  When we got there, no goldens, even though there was one on-line.  So, we opted for a Fennec Fox, looks like a golden whose ears decided to stick up.  We even found bandannas like Will’s.  How perfect!  And it worked.  These little fleece packages of fuzz brought smiles through the tears and suddenly there were some snickers and laughter made its way back.  Kids are amazing!

It worked, they were excited.  And the healing began.  Life can continue now.

I told the kids that they were hurting so badly, simply because they loved so deeply.  Now, Willow is gone and she took part of their hearts with her to keep her company.  All the joy over the last 13 years, is worth the sorrow.  But it does not make it any easier.

Rest In Peace Princess Willow, your reign was amazing.  

January 24, 1999-April 1, 2012.  We will love you forever.

1 Apr


1 Apr

Not so sure I can do this.  I have Willow laying here next to me.  I am not ready to say good-bye.  The Tramadol has made her so much more comfortable.  I can make her comfortable, can I take more time?  Will there be a right time?

With the boys, there was no real option.  Riley’s cancer made it so that he could not keep food down, I was not going to have a dog of mine living with an NG tube.  Curly was having uncontrollable seizures.  But with  Willow, we have to make a decision…and I don’t want to.

At least I know she’ll be in good paws when she crosses the Rainbow Bridge…take care of her boys. 

Lord, give me strength…

End of the Golden Age

30 Mar
My bedrest Buddies
Once upon a time, there were three goldens.  They were the loveliest pack of Misfits you had ever seen.  Sounds like a lovely fairy tale.  But, if you read the REAL fairy tales, they are not always happy endings.  That’s where we are now.

The youngest, but longest residing golden resident at the House of Hounds is HRH Maximillian’s Princess Willow (curled up on the left).  Will joined us at 6 weeks of age.  She was the first pup I picked up from the litter and I never put her down.  I think she was a surrogate for the baby we had just lost.  Just to give you an idea, she was in a litter of 13.  We were there at feeding time.  I put her down so she could eat, she walked past her littermates and stood in the middle of the food pan.  All the other puppies were obediently lined up around the outside, not the pup I picked, she put herself in the food, and took the lion’s share.  Willow was the princess and boss lady from the very beginning.  As we began to develop our pack, she let the boys know she was boss.  
Willow and Riley…how they always were.
Next came Riley.  We decided we wanted another pup to add to our pack, so we consulted the rescue pages.  GRRoW had this sad little guy on there.  He had been in foster care for a year and a half, after his original owners had decided to put him down at a year and a half because of his weight and his allergies.  Now, I have a hard time picturing this guy roly-poly, but whatever.  Anyway, he developed canine epilepsy, had bi-lateral entropia and had such severe allergies to EVERYTHING, he was bare from the rib cage down.  But he was the sweetest boy in the world.  We drove to Iowa to pick him up.  Had him on a raw food diet until we could figure out what he could eat.  Within 2 years, he had a full coat and a happy disposition.  We lost him on my birthday in 2008.  It was a horribly heartbreaking moment.  He developed cancer and we went from dx to rainbow bridge in 2 weeks. It was a very sad period in our home.
This was the night Curly came to us, it was like he had
always been here.
Then, because 2 kids and 2 dogs is not enough, we adopted Curly.  Curly was a 9 year-old curly coated red golden.  He was a stray that probably took off during the 4th of July fireworks.  He had such a hard case of heart worm, it took 2 rounds of treatment and nearly killed him.  But he was a fighter and pulled through.  Curly-Q was another hard luck case that I had to take care of.  Aside from being HW+, he also had a misshapen throat that was at a 90 degree angle and mega-esophagus – his throat does swallow all the way, if that makes sense.  So, he had to have his food blended and we spent many trips digging food and poop out of his throat when he decided to eat other things.  We thought we would give him a good life, for the nest 3 or 4 year.  My Curly boy was so tough, he made it to his 18th birthday last July, after dealing with Cancer that started in his lungs and spread to his lungs and stomach – for 2 years.  We had hoped to get a few weeks.  He was an amazing boy. 
My Willow is the only golden left.  She is 13 now.  Her hips are gone (so much for certified hips from the breeder), as is her vision.  She has developed diabetes, requiring grain free food and insulin.  Up until the last few days, she bossed the boys around, told them when it was time to settle down, when they could enter the room. Now, not many order are being barked by the princess.  I thought I wanted her to quit barking, now I find myself missing it.  This morning, I had to work very hard to get her to join the boys for breakfast.  Her coat looks horrible.  She has a terrible hot spot I can’t seem to control.  I think my girl may be joining her buddies on the other side of the rainbow bridge.  I had a hard time doing my make-up this morning as I realized that “the time” was announcing its presence.  The tears just kept flowing.    She was my only pup, well Bear was 10 months when we got him.  Will was my only little fuzz ball. She was how we practiced being parents, getting up with her in the middle of the night.  The kids have never known life without her.  
Dog park, tennis ball…is there anything else to life?
I have not talked to the kids yet.  They have been through this twice, but it never gets easier.  I am not looking forward to this.  They may be property in the eyes of the law, but they are my furry kids in my heart.  Please keep our family in your prayers.  And boys, please meet Willow at the Rainbow Bridge and show her the ropes.

Spoke Too Soon

28 Mar

An Odd Phenomon

27 Mar